I met a couple of really great girls at a party this weekend. After we had been talking for awhile, the new girls confessed to me their love for reading the Craigslist Missed Connections and inquired if I myself ever read them. I had to admit that yes, in fact, I do read the Craiglist Missed Connections from time-to-time. That shit is some good entertainment, yo.
Later on, I was still thinking about the Metropass Guy. I relayed the story to Ingrid and the new girls. "What," I wanted to know, "would YOU have done in this situation?" Implied but not said: You are all WAY cooler than me, surely you would have had the appropriate response in your bag of tricks.
"Well, what did you say?" Ingrid wanted to know.
"I said ‘Thanks!’"
"What?! That’s it? And then what?"
"Err, I went through the turnstile …"
"And all you said was, ‘Thanks’?"
"And did you at least turn back to smile at him?"
"No … "
"Les, what the fuck?"
"Yea. I know."
This went on for some time. We all agreed I had acted like a moron, but we didn’t get very far in determining out how I could have avoided acting like a moron. It was night, I was alone, I was wearing earphones, I was running late and in this city, you really don’t expect anyone to do anything nice.
Consensus: It was too random. Your reaction sucked, but ours wouldn’t have been much better.
"You should write a Craigslist Missed Connection," suggested Amanda.
"Do you think anybody ever gets together through those?"
"Sure, Devora had like, six guys respond when she posted hers looking for some dude eating carrots on Bloor Street."
"Were any the real Carrot Eater?"
"No, of course not.’
"You just want to read my Missed Connection."
"That’s true, but still, you should do it."
Leslie’s Missed Connection:
You were super cute and whipped out your Metropass to let me in the subway for free at St.Clair West, Heath Street side, Friday night about 7:30 pm.
I was wearing a huge flower on my coat and and expression that said, "WTF is your problem? Oh, and by the way, I am a giant bitch."
When I figured out what was going on, I said something extremely clever such as, "Thanks!" In fact, I might have said it two or three times. I’m sure it sounded more clever with each repetition.
If you read this, I insist you give me a do-over as, despite appearances, I am neither a bitch nor a moron. I’m actually quite nice, if somewhat socially inept. Email me!
Rest assured, My Public, I will keep you apprised of any further developments in this matter. Incidentally, I read a few pages of Missed Connections and I have to say, "Wow, what a boring lot." Mine is totally the best one on there, by far. I think I could start a successful side business writing Missed Connections.
If this reminds anyone at all of the Simon Gagne thing … the answer to your question is, no, that bastard still hasn’t written me. (And by "bastard" I mean, "I love you Simon! Email me!")