Calling it like it is.

I was having dinner with The Egyptian up the street at the Thai place.  We got on the topic of why the hell do I have so many bruises all the time anyway?  Sometimes the bruises are really big, some include a bump, are frequently in strange places and typically turn a deep, dark purple that would be beautiful if not for the fact that they look incredibly tender and painful.

He wondered why on Earth, if I bump into something hard enough to produce such an ugly bruise, I generally can't remember what happened.  I don't think I imagined an implication that sometimes I am lying about the origin of such marks. 

The truth is, I am a klutz.  I bump into so many things and say, "OUCH" so many times in one day that my brain can't possibly retain all that useless information.  Why, in just the hour before book club arrived on Sunday I got a piece of glass stuck in my foot and scraped my elbow by smashing it off a door frame.  It's a miracle I don't look like I've been in a bar brawl 99% of the time.

I said, "I am a klutz.  And, maybe I just bruise very easily?"  I think it is possible that I turn purple with less impact than others.  Then, I hypothesized that perhaps I have the same (or, okay, a slightly higher number of) bruises than others, but one is simply more likely to notice them on me because my skin is pale.

The Egyptian gaped at me, incredulous.  "Baby, that skin is not pale.  It's white."

One thought on “Calling it like it is.

  1. lol..
    since I was 10 or so, when my body popped out some hips, I have never learned how to control them… i bump into stuff every day too 🙂 (recently, it’s been my elbows though. UGH!)
    here at work, they had another desk in my office about 3.5 feet away from the edge of mine, and for 10 months, i bumped into the edge of either mine, or the other’s at least 4 times per day! OW.. one day, i just got sick of it, and turned the other desk around to face the wall. (no one’s using it). AHH MUCH BETTER. No more sore hips for me…. well, at least at work 😉

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