Guess what, you guys? I will be spending my Saturday night in a sleep clinic. It’s pretty awesome. I bet you wish that’s what you were doing on Saturday night! You are totally jealous of my happening single life!
I think this is really my last resort. I have tried every home remedy known to mankind. If I don’t start getting more sleep I am probably going to do something really retarded. Example: This morning I was talking to my boss on the phone and I began to think she was speaking Chinese. I could NOT understand what she was saying. It ended being something not particularly complex like, “Please sign that letter and send it.” Seriously.
I miss sleep. My greatest fear is that my sleep testing is going to prove that I don’t have any sleep problems, that I am basically just bonkers. Hopefully even if I am just bonkers they will give me some drugs. I don’t care about my liver anymore. I just want to sleep a whole night.
Anyway, they kick you out of this place at six in the morning! Whaaat? And a credible source tells me that you leave with “cum looking gunk in your hair”. So if nothing else, at least it’ll look like I had a pretty exciting night.