Coldwater Canoe Race

It is against my personal philosophy to post pictures of people on the internet without asking their permission, but I don't know who these people are to ask. Hopefully, if you guys ever find this, you won't sue me since I am posting this because you're AWESOME.

Every summer my cousin Ivan’s wife, Angela, participates in a canoe race and every year, I don’t go to watch the canoe race. It was getting a bit embarrassing. I decided this would be the year I’d get off my ass and go to Coldwater to see her paddle.

Soon enough, I remember why I avoid events like this: I can’t say no and I end up Getting Involved.

The canoe race is usually organized by the Lion’s Club, but for some reason, they opted not to do it this year. Angela, because she is amazing / out of her mind, took the whole thing on herself. I admired that. So, when she asked if a lawyer at my work could put together a waiver for the race, I was sunk. I was officially Involved.

You’d think that this kind of thing would be a perk of working in a large law firm, however, it’s not.  My boss is pretty cool though and I knew if I came up with a draft, she’d mark it up for me.

I stitched together a waiver, based on the waivers of a dragon boat team and some outdoors club that I found online, and the one I signed at my gym. I got Alex to look at it and she made one suggestion – while I’d made them swear that they were in good enough physical condition to perform strenuous exercise and would wear a PFD, she thought they should specifically warrant that they could swim – which I added. Then I emailed it off to Ange and said a prayer that nobody would die. You can make someone promise to hold you harmless all you want, you know it’s pretty much a crock if someone drowns.

Race day came and I ended up working the registration desk. For an introvert, working the registration desk is a nightmare. Talking to all those people? Fortunately, my aunt, another sucker, was doing the worst part, taking payment and assigning boat numbers. At least I got to do something that I am naturally good at – being a buzzkill. I was in charge of ensuring everyone signed the waivers.

When we registered the woman pictured above, I knew immediately her team was going to win the race. Her arms and shoulders were totally ripped. Not to mention the rest of her. I am not going to lie, I was kind of in love/lust with her.

If I remember correctly, the course is about 14 kilometres long. That’s a pretty serious challenge for the upper body.  When these two crossed the finish line (in first place, as I predicted), she looked as if she might pop out of her canoe and run a marathon. I thought she was absolutely amazing.

As women, we sometimes get into the bad habit of wishing we are “skinny”. It’s hard not to when that’s overwhelmingly the standard of beauty we are presented with. I wish we could see more images of women like the lady above. She is WAY hotter than anything I’ve ever seen in a fashion magazine. If we’re going to aspire to an ideal, this should be it. Healthy and buff.

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